The lost Taco Bell ad with Jerry Manuel and Francisco Rodriguez

Inside a Taco Bell, JERRY MANUEL walks up to a CUSTOMER staring at his chalupa.

MANUEL

You're done, kid. You're slower than John Maine.

Manuel touches his left arm. The customer gets up and Manuel slaps him on the butt.

PEDRO FELICIANO walks over. He has put on a lot of weight.

FELICIANO

Skip, I don't feel too good.

CUSTOMER

This is what happens when you make him help finish a chalupa every day.

MANUEL
Fine, I'll just go to my closer.

Manuel slaps Feliciano on the butt. He touches his right arm.

As FRANCISCO RODRIGUEZ walks toward the chalupa, he passes the exiting customer.

CUSTOMER
Let's see if you can have a good outing for a change.

RODRIGUEZ
Excuse me?

CUSTOMER
You heard me.

The customer and Rodriguez start shoving each other. Rodriguez slips and falls, slamming his jaw on the corner of a table.

CUT TO:

Rodriguez sits glumly. His jaw is wired shut.

Trainer RAY RAMIREZ turns to Manuel.

RAMIREZ
I’m afraid he won’t be finishing any chalupas the rest of the season.

Manuel throws his hands in the air. OLIVER PEREZ approaches the chalupa.

Manuel slaps Ramirez on the butt.

RAMIREZ
Aren’t you supposed to slap Frankie?

MANUEL
You think I'm laying a hand on him?

Perez picks up the chalupa, cardboard packaging and all, and starts to put the whole thing in his mouth.

MANUEL
You're not supposed to eat the cardboard.

Perez takes the chalupa out of the box. But as he brings it to his face, he misses his mouth and the chalupa flies out of his hands and up in the air.

LUIS CASTILLO settles under the flying chalupa. It lands in his hands, then bounces out and hits the floor, splattering everyone with ground beef, nacho cheese, bits of taco shell and toppings.

At a nearby table, JEFF WILPON turns to SANDY ALDERSON.

WILPON
All right, Sandy - think you can clean up this mess?

Ghost of Castillo play hangs over Met win

Last year's Bronx Subway Series opener ended in the ultimate nightmare for the Mets when Luis Castillo's drop turned victory into defeat. This year, two of Jerry Manuel's moves almost caused the same result.

Things could hardly be going better for the Mets right now, so I hate to harp on the few negatives. And Manuel did manage the bullpen well in the seventh and eighth. But when the Mets tacked on runs in both the eighth and ninth, this should have been a routine victory, not one in which future Hall of Famer Derek Jeter got to bat in the ninth as the tying run.

Manuel brought in Elmer Dessens to start the seventh, then pulled him after Dessens gave up a double to Francisco Cervelli. Pedro Feliciano entered, got all three outs in the seventh, then pitched the eighth as well. So far, so good. Manuel managed the bullpen aggressively, pulling Dessens quickly, then letting Feliciano go an extra inning. Thanks to the tack-on runs, the Mets led, 4-0, going into the bottom of the ninth.

With a four-run lead, it makes sense to at least start the ninth with someone besides Francisco Rodriguez. Granted, with Feliciano and Dessens already used, there was no clearly good option. But Raul Valdes, who had pitched only once since June 2? And there was a reason he has pitched so infrequently - his meltdown in San Diego when he allowed eight earned runs in two appearances while getting only one out.

Bringing in Valdes to start the ninth was a mistake. But leaving Valdes in after he gave up a single to Cervelli was a bigger mistake. You want to give him a chance with a four-run lead? Fine. But when Dessens, who is pitching a lot better than Valdes, gave up a hit to Cervelli in the seventh, Dessens was out. So why should Valdes get another chance?

Once Valdes gave up a hit to Curtis Granderson, Manuel finally brought in Rodriguez. After a 12-pitch at-bat, Brett Gardner walked. Suddenly, the bases were loaded with one out and the top of the Yankee order was coming up.

I was watching in a bar that was showing the YES broadcast, and they decided this was a good time to show the Castillo play. (I'm guessing SNY did not make the same decision.) But the Yankees were suddenly in a position to pull out what looked to be a hopelessly lost game. And once again, the culprit was Manuel's book.

In the postgame, Manuel admitted that he was not going to bring in K-Rod until it was a save situation. Manuel manages by the book way too often, without considering other factors. Here's a thought - a four-run lead against the Yankees, in their ballpark, is not as safe as most other four-run leads. Manuel didn't need to wait for the second baserunner to consider it a save situation.

I know the Yankee bats are slumping right now, but it's still a great lineup, and they bombed Roy Halladay just three days ago.

Fortunately, it all worked out. The Mets have won eight in a row, are 7-0 on the road trip, and have clinched at least a tie in this year's Subway Series.

The ghosts may have come out at the old Yankee Stadium, but the closest we came to the ghost of the Castillo play came when tonight's Met second baseman, Ruben Tejada, dropped a ball in the eighth, allowing Nick Swisher, who had tagged up, to slide safely into second. But Swisher didn't score.

I couldn't help but wince, though, when David Wright caught the game-ending popup with one hand.

Jerry Manuel: Managing without thinking

Football coaches have a two-point conversion chart that tells them under what circumstances they should go for two instead of kicking an extra point. The chart tells them what to do - they don't have to think about the decision.

Kind of like how Jerry Manuel makes many of his decisions.

When Manuel brought Francisco Rodriguez into the game in the eighth, the pitcher's spot was due to bat third in the ninth. The book says to do a double switch with the player who made the last out.

So Manuel followed the book and double-switched Jeff Francoeur out of the game, replacing him with Gary Matthews Jr.

Here's what this move accomplished: With two outs and none on in the top of the ninth, Matthews came up instead of Frankie.

Going into the game, Matthews was hitting .193 with 23 strikeouts in 57 at bats. That's 40% of his at bats. So it's not exactly second-guessing to say I was not surprised when Matthews struck out again.

In return for giving Matthews another chance to strike out, Manuel removed Francoeur, his hottest hitter and a strong defensive right fielder, and replaced him with Matthews, who does not belong in the major leagues.

Fortunately, Matthews did not have a chance to come up again in a big spot or fail to make a throw that Francoeur would have made. Manuel had another plan for blowing the game.

Bringing in Raul Valdes.

Manuel mismanaged Valdes when he stretched him out to be a spot starter, than used Fernando Nieve instead on Saturday night in Milwaukee. Nightly Nieve has been mediocre for weeks since Manuel started burning him out. But Manuel wanted Nieve to start over Valdes because the Brewers had a mostly righthanded lineup.

When you have two journeyman pitchers, you should go with the one who's hot, not by the book of which one is a lefty. But only Manuel would figure that the best use of an overworked reliever would be to give him a start. Not surprising, Nieve did poorly.

Meanwhile, Valdes didn't pitch for six days, then came into the Monday night game and gave up four runs without retiring a batter. He pitched so poorly he looked as if he were injured.

Maybe Valdes was messed up because his perceived role kept changing. Or maybe there was something wrong with him and he would have pitched poorly had he started on Saturday.

But once Valdes had his Monday meltdown, one would think that he would not be used in a big spot just two days later unless there was no alternative. Yet despite having other options, Manuel sent him out tonight for the eleventh.

It was clear from the start that there was still something wrong with Valdes. The only out he got was on a sacrifice bunt.

But Adrian Gonzalez, scheduled to bat fifth in the inning, is a lefty, so the book says to be sure to leave Valdes in.

Going into the game, Gonzalez had nine homers and 23 RBI in 128 AB against righthanders, but no homers and 5 RBI in 58 RBI against lefties.

Make that one homer and 9 RBI.

When Gonzalez came up with one out and the bases loaded, Valdes had only retired one of the nine batters he had faced in his two San Diego appearances, and that was on the sacrifice bunt. The odds of Valdes retiring Gonzalez, who was already 3 for 5 (and by the way, two of those hits were off lefty Johan Santana), were pretty low.

Would Jenrry Mejia have gotten Gonzalez out? Who knows. But it was worth a try, since Valdes was not going to get the job done.

It's a shame that the Mets can't score runs for Johan and that Frankie blew the save. But at least Johan is pitching really well and Frankie still has overall good numbers. Would I trust him in a playoff game? Maybe not, but the Mets aren't likely to have that worry for awhile.

Not when their manager is making moves that make no sense.

Remembering the 2000 AL Manager of the Year race

The Managers of the Year were announced earlier today and Squawker Lisa and I just competed in a trivia contest, so here's a trivia question:

Who won the American League Manager of the Year in 2000 and who finished second?

And who did they beat out?

Before I give the answers, Lisa and I had a great time at the trivia contest, which was run by our fellow blogger The Omnipotent Q of the Mighty Quinn Media Machine. The best thing was seeing Lisa trying to keep her cool in a Red Sox bar decorated with various pro-Red Sox and anti-Yankee memorabilia! It was also fun to hear how the three Red Sox players Lisa dislikes the most - Jonathan Papelbon, Kevin Youkilis and Dustin Pedroia - are Q's favorite Bosox.

As for the 2000 AL Manager of the Year race, here are the runners-up:

3. Lou Piniella, Mariners
4. Mike Scioscia, Angels
5. Joe Torre, Yankees

So who beat out this impressive group?

The AL Manager of the Year in 2000 was White Sox skipper Jerry Manuel.

Second place went to A's skipper Art Howe.

In the NL that year, Bobby Valentine finished fourth, behind winner Dusty Baker of the Giants, the Cardinals' Tony LaRussa and the Braves' Bobby Cox.

Jose Reyes and all that jazz

I've watched or taped several live baseball events recently, but today was the first one in some time that did not involve apologies or cousins. There was an honest-to-goodness game on! And the Mets beat the Marlins, 9-0. Didn't make up for how they played against the Marlins at the end of last season, but it was great to see the Mets out on the field again, at the dawn of a new season filled with hope.

***

When Willie Randolph tried to tone down Jose Reyes, the Met shortstop went into a slump. But Jerry Manuel seems to have found the right words to inspire Reyes, or should I say the right music:

"I love the energy that Jose Reyes brings, but I don't always like the anxiety that comes with it. I want to calm that down. He needs to play at jazz time. And he's playing at a hip-hop level. I want him to the best jazz player he can be."

Comparing Reyes to jazz is almost as odd as batting him third. Does this mean his at-bat music will now be "Take Five" by Dave Brubeck?

Instead of singing "Jose, Jose, Jose," will Met fans instead perform jazz hands?

Then again, Reyes did hit two homers and drive in six while batting third today. That's something to get jazzed about.

True, it's only the second day of spring training, and Reyes was hitting in his usual spot after the pitcher, since Manuel batted Oliver Perez second to make sure he would get a time at bat.

And Johan Santana has been scratched from his next start due to elbow soreness.

But there was a ballgame on today. Baseball is back!